Happy Valentines Day everyone! Yeah, it’s that day of the year again where you fit into one of the following categories:

  • Spoiled by gifts and affection and find yourself uploading to social media for the world to see
  • Receive nothing and it makes you so angry your mouth foams like a rabid dog
  • Don’t give a shit but still acknowledge the day by saying the mandatory line to your significant other
  • Don’t give a shit but are guilt tripped into it by your significant other to pretend you give a shit
  • Do the washing, fold the washing, get grocery shopping done, light housework and feed the house and then remember it’s V-Day but don’t give a shit…

Regardless of where you fit into this list, perhaps you don’t, there is always the Herald Sun’s Pullout section -The Love Book to get you through the day. With coffee in hand I began the perusing and came across some regular patterns and here’s what I found. *Secretly I was checking to see if Ben gave a shit… hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

People really are ‘in love’ and still call each other pet names, even Bae; which means poo in Danish. That’s true love right? “I love you Poo”.

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There’s always a little mystery… met at the tennis or they have a pet hawk? Stallion… NEIGH!!! Go you wild thing!

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Thank the heavens for Tinder but what if they’d swiped left?

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What about trying to get your point across in more than two lines for FREE… Tight arse!! Margot, are you feeling the immense love from random tight person?

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Or perhaps it’s a bunch of smart arse friends taking the piss? Poor Gavin Scott.

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Same sex lovers….??? (Had to take the opportunity to get my name in there – it all fitted, thanks Josh!)

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Or just plain weird; bleeding walrus.. that’s passion alright, and I think you mean planets?!

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And then there is acceptance for who you are no matter your ‘hand size’, what you eat or don’t eat (or suck), how you look or what you ‘have’… Alec, just WHAT did you give him/her??

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Oh and don’t forget the true secret admirers and sexual trysts going on around us;

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There is always a few with a political agenda or point to make;

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And those who have love and lost, and still trying to find it 😥

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Teachers, parents and family members all get some love too, even if I had to cook my own eggs this morning, so long as Mum and Dad NG are feeling the love :/

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Oh and the old school tree scratching N.R. 4 B.R. kind of love. Nawwww, can you feel it?Huh?

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Even Lisa and Ralph, and Steve get a mention as Elvis Cruises plugs them self.

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So there really is something for everybody.

I hope you all had a fab Sunday, and for those of you with broken hearts and wishing for a bunch of flowers, or chocolate from random man riding a horse, holding flowers coming down your driveway… there’s always next years edition of the Love Book.

Make sure you turn the teapot twice clockwise and once anticlockwise!

Nom